3.50 mugs at the bar.
Nah man, im with an ugly chick. Im waiting til everyone's drunk enough tonight, they don't notice.
How ugly, and does she have friends?
i told my doctor i had 3 partners and one unprotected.. shes a cute little indian lady i couldnt break her heart
just watched a girl laugh at her own fingers... it's not even noon...
She is putting glow sticks from her bedroom to the bathroom. She is calling it 'Being prepared'. God help us all tonight...
I asked for a dramatic "funeral" look for my makeup. They judged me.
got delayed, meet you at the bar soon, found a shopping cart, i am now getting pushed to the bar by some guy that was peeing in the alley i found the cart in
She asked the woman in the drive through to cover everything she ordered in mayonnaise, including here chilli cheese fries. Didn't happen. Then she started swerving at the car next to us screaming, asking if they had mayonnaise.
I was a battlefield of empty bottles and bodies. We though we won, but the booze had the last laugh.
I can not say for certain that I did not blow someone in the bathroom at the bar at some point.
I'm so fucking horny right now If I blink I might cum
i'm not sure what happened last night.. i do remember the police calling me to find out where i was because apparently at some point i went missing? don't worry though. they found me
I just gate-crahed a party and met a state senator, so I had an interesting afternoon jog.
woke up to my little sister's best-friend's boyfriend in my bed, but how's your saturday going?
Don't tell me I can do whatever makes me happy while also saying I have to put on pants.
If wanting to text you my feelings after three mojitos is wrong I don't wanna be right.
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