...there is blood under my fingernails.
...I hope my roomates are okay.
So one buddy got tackled at the urinals by national guard members and was arrested. Another had sex in a port o potty with possibly the drunkest girl I've ever encountered. The rest of us blacked out and won a few bets. So yes, the derby did meet our expectations.
We're too lazy to do dishes, so we're making sangria in a flower vase.
She's been drinking and was roller blading. I'm sure you can do the math
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
You could say the cab driver was less than excited when we called his personal cell phone at 4am for directions back to our hotel after having blacked out at the club
My vagina senses are tingling. I know your here.
Dude i swear to christ if he sends me one more pic of a "magnificent dump" im changing my number
Look if 10 am was too early to go barrel tasting the winery would not be open.
If you do that, i will make all sorts of uncomfortable comments about my nipples being soft
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I guess crabs is what I get for sleeping with my ex.
My sugar daddy is a bigger asshole than i am. What's wrong here?
it is a dangerous dangerous place where morals and dignity go to die and all your fantasies about men become reality.
Everyone keeps telling me I look so healthy and happy today: the power of the penis people!!
My talents include parallel parking and over reacting about absolutely everything.. And drinking..
I didn't want to shower, so I shaved my legs in the pool . That drunk .
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