there are some really hot girls on the bus. i want to lips them
I'd fuck her but she fucked Dusty. And I'm pretty sure he's humped livestock
Just tried to tap morse code on the wall seperating our beds to tell you I was awake and ready to smoke
Do the low cut shirt test. If he stares at your tits even in front of your brother, he's down.
So let me get this straight. You would sleep with an uncircumcised guy whose name you didn't know, but you won't try the new shrimp taco from taco bell?
How many ice cream sandwiches is an acceptable meal replacement?
2.5
I actually didn't mind her sub-par blowjob skills.. It took me back to a time when skipping class was noticed, and my liver didn't look like a worn out shoe
The door opens out but somehow she managed to kick it in..
me blowing you awake is the exact turn i want our relationship to take
I cried at the bouncer while saying I wished he was my father... They had no idea what to do with me.
He unbuckled his belt, tipped his hat at me, then told me to "saddle up"
this is like your 5th cowboy right? where do you keep finding these guys?!!
steve's beating me 4-2 in our "sexually confusing straight people" competition. steve is a wizard. this is not a drill.
It feels like the devil is humping my brain with his razor sharp erection.
I feel like I shouldn't be left around 30 year olds when I'm drunk
I HAD SEX WITH COLBY AND HIS FIVE YEAR PLAN IS TO STEAL A REALLY EXPENSIVE PAINTING AND ASKED ME IF ID BE INTO HELPING HIM AND I WOKE UP IN HIS BED TO A WOMANS TUBE TOP NEXT TO ME
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