so i just saw your dad embarking upon a biking journey in full reflective gear
...this stays between you and me
I just told the 2nd grade class leprechauns are the children of midgets.
He tried to carry her to her room after she passed out, but when he picked her up she came back to, saw him, screamed rape and pulled out her vuvuzela app and blasting it like a rape whistle.
creepy tank top guy is at campus health. he's hitting on a girl recovering from a panic attack.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
You stood next to him taking HUGE gasps of air in an attempt to second hand smoke his cig because you didn't have one...
I tried to get you something for Valentine's Day too but they said they couldn't deliver skittles and ecstasy :(
I just encountered the same creepy guy I showed you, he jumped inside the dumpster screaming.
This is a sacred holiday in the land of the free! I do what I want!
Dude, my ex girlfriend showed up, bought me a tequila shot, made out with me and then disappeared into the night. Then her current girlfriend saw, so she came over and slapped me and then I made out with her too
This was before halftime
I RUINED A LESBIAN RELATIONSHIP BEFORE HALFTIME
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Say what you want about my van, but I've got more action there than in my apartment. A body pillow and a joint still go a long way!
I'm glad you don't care about kids. That's one of your better qualities.
But I don't see you as the jesus riding a dinosaur with a machine gun type of guy
Sometimes being bisexual is a curse. Turns out I banged both of her older twin brothers last summer.
It’s 830 am and the amount of Valentine’s Day snaps I’ve already seen makes me either want to vom, drink a bottle of wine, or buy chocolate
1000% No lie I was just looking on insta and was thinking about taking a bottle of wine to the face..
Well it was okay until he pinned my arms over my head and I found the loaded pistol tucked behind the bed... THIS IS WHY WE DON'T FUCK BOYS IN MONTANA ANYMORE
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