Does it really count as two different guys if they're brothers? I like to think of it as one and a half.
I was hoping we just happened to wake up naked and I hadn't fucked him.... no such luck.
She was raised with a wonderful home life. I can't do anything with that.
you handed the cop a condom last night and said "it's all about protect and serve right?"
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I just want dick. Yours just gets priority because it is glorious
It's embarrassing enough people in my life are aware of the ridiculous things that happen to me. I don't think we need to get the whole world involved.
STDs are my biggest fear, besides whales. They're so fucking big.
No one is allowed to go to bed until all bottles are finished, I don't want to feel my face tongiht. Do you understand?
Going through Bojangles drive thru chanting "KFC" hammered at 8:00 was the highlight.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Forced to cancel my booty call due to the snowpocalypse. This crosses the line.
Dude, you were tagged in a stripper FB selfie. That is a whole new level of something.....
She told me having sex was our civic duty. How can I not love her?
Sara can't come to the phone right now. She's currently having an in-depth conversation with a flower pot.
He screamed, "Let there be light!" when he came
If you left your bike out in front, I just watched some dude steal it.
Randomize