Just fell off a train. Bad.
she tried giving me head in the pool. it was more entertaining than pleasurable
The guys had to come into the bar bathroom and pep talk us all off the floor
This girl came outta nowhere yelling HOLD MY DICKKKKKK!
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I have a new philosophy. Fuck wearing bras, it's summertime.
Well it's official... The first guy I ever gave head to now holds 2 world records. Should I text him asking if I can try and break my record?
I got Pilsbury cinnamon rolls for us to have tomorrow, but I don't have the willpower to leave them in my fridge overnight, so I am eating them all and getting us more in the morning
I love you more by the minute
My mouth is so dry that I'm about to put a straw in a jar of Vaseline and chug. This all addi diet definitely has its ups and downs.
Just figured out my hair is long enough to tie my wrists together. . .get over here NOW!
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you can't just say no to brian. he was bugging me to get me to drunk for 14 hours straight yesterday. HE DOESN'T GIVE UP
We smoked weed. AS A FAMILY. IT WAS BEAUTIFUL.
I agree and I would be an awesome dog
He started planning our future mid-hookup. You tell me how my night was.
I don't know if I'm more disturbed by the fact that you hooked up with a dude with one arm, or that "hook up with a dude with one arm" was on your bucket list.
I absolutely love waking up to see my phone search history is "xj" "qj" "cj" "uj" and "kj"
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