you know whats awesome about this morning. A suprise visit from my dad at 7:30 am. There was a pair of heels on the lawn and a girl sleeping in just her underwear on the floor of my living room. He either thinks im a champion or a total fuck up. I'm thinking fuck up but im hoping champion.
'fingered' and 'feelings' NEVER belong in the same sentence.
No offense but you kinda look like a Jack Johnson fan in that pic
I KNOW you don't honestly think you can pay me back in lotto tickets.
I'm gonna have sex with a woman...help
we have 69 mutual friends...i have to add her
Woke up un the hot tuv. Climbed out fo the hot tub and fell asleeo. Woke ip again in the hot tub.
he doesn't drink and he's an emt - he'll be our dd for nye in exchange for a threesome tomorrow afternoon.
He would only do it doggy style. The "he's probably gay" debate rages on...
You said "sustain yourself" quietly over and over as you fed joeys hamster cashews. Acid you is a trip
what the hell is that chicken wire thing she's holding?
An artistic expression of her stupidity.
Nipple rings and loofahs DO NOT mix.
Just woke up to find that I'd left a stove burner on for the past 6 hours or so. I'm now banned from Ambien cooking.
But at least i made friends with the nice lesbian cop. She knew i was her kind when she had to confiscate my rainbow/pride rolling papers.
I put him in the supply closet, used the copy paper to build a fort around him and his wheelchair, then he fucked me in the fort.
Randomize
