I wish I loved anything like you love Tequila.
I'm starting to have hip problems from having my legs spread too often.
Just break the ice by asking who had to take plan b this past semester
The usual, bring face make up, I have a weird gash on my nose, probably from my one night stand
Somehow me not being able to breathe due to cocaine doesn't seem very domesticated.
The cops raided her house the day before class even started
Those assholes are becoming so efficient
Now that I'm sober, I'm realizing you put your name in my phone as "wowww"
So, no matter what happens today, hold on to this. At least you're not naked under your ex husband's trench coat being stopped by the police who also work with your ex husband. Long story. Actually, not a long story. That's it.
Wish me luck. My vagina needs it.
May his noodley appendage touch you.
I mean really am I setting up a snapchat when I'm 40 so I can send nudes to my 23 yr old bf? yes, yes I am. Where is my life heading.
Whoever jacked off in MY pong room on the bean bag with your fucking googles pick up your fucking cum towel you gross disgusting fucks. I said NO MORE jacking off in that room. I swear I will empty it out if this is going to continue.
I made out with a 40 year old and told her we were dating then got kicked out of a gay bar. This is the day I stop drinking.
I would throw a dart into the Olympic ceremony and fuck whoever it hit
a reward? ill think of something
if its not drugs or food I swear to god ill throw a fit
You don't make any sense
TEQUILA
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