we should wear snuggies to the strip club
I was wrong being drunk doesn't make accounting more interesting
Its official. 'Jingle Bell Rock' gives me a boner. Thank you Lindsay Lohan & Rachel McAdams.
There was a fucking SNAKE in the urinal. WHAT THE FUCK
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Your subconscious sucks. Mine is awesome. I have a recurring dream where I manage a chocolate factory run by big titted hookers.
A) you're a liar. B) that would be awesome.
Okay. We're coming naked. We need Saran wrap and plastic forks.
I'm driving while wearing hulk hands
I feel like the way dolphins mate would be the approach that a guy would have to use in order for you to sleep with them
I was trying to climb into what I thought was a bunk bed.. Turns out it was just a cabinet under the sink in a bathroom
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I think I'm too tall to 69 successfully.
I think I might cry.
She called his dick the colossus. I dont give a fuck if shes his wingman, I gotta see this natural wonder
It's midsummers eve. A.k.a. come over so we can get drunk and wear leaf crowns
You kept flirting with some guy while I was throwing up on the sidewalk, and I screamed YOU DON'T LIKE MEN
Drunk me just want to text sober me for saving that half rack of ribs I loves you
You asked me how red your eyes were... they were shut.
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