stalking is really helping my grade.. I followed him to a review session tonight
I just heard someone say "gosh-darnit" and they didn't have a southern twang. I worry for New York.
Just mixed vicodin and mucinex. This cold just got fun.
the only consolation to the fact that i puked in public today was that i did it down a storm drain... so at least i am a responsible public puker
Ladies, we have an appointment at David's Bridal aurora this coming Sunday at 3pm. And an appointment at where ever tequila is served at noon.
She started ignoring us once we told her we were out to celebrate your abortion. Who knew strippers could be judgemental?
It's the only time I've ever felt manly shitting myself
I was looking at your puke while I was peeing in it the next morning and that ceasar salad did not treat you well
Dude she hit me with my own penis and it hurt. I've never been cock slapped but she slapped me with my own cock so it has to be worse.
How did you get him out of the shower last time?
Order Taco Bell and leave a trail of burritos leading to his bed.
Woke up, moved an empty handle of fireball to spit blood, then put the morning cigarette out in it.
Go forth my friend, but don't do any of that fruitful and multiplying shit.
video games take priority over anything else you can offer me.
"He's not as cute as he was last week" and "I'm not as drunk as I was last week" are basically the same sentence.
Dignity. Ruined. Must. Smoke. Weed.
Randomize
