They say rihanna has been dating several mets players. They go on to say that she feels safe with them because they can't beat anybody.
i just turned the eviction notice into a beer pong list
I'm surprised you like me... I didn't think I was your type.
Blonde hair and big tits is every guys type.
I smelled my fingers after she left and they smelt like sugar cookies. I want that one again.
The story about him having a girlfriend changed real fast when he found out that I was a gymnast
So, we're going at it on the sink when a German kid walks in and starts brushing his teeth. I love hostel sex.
Fastest blow job ever. Though it was probably a good thing since we were in front of my house.
This dude. Just lost. A finger. He asked us for tape.
seriously considering responding to a craigslist ad for a lesbian cunninlingus instructor...at this point i'm so desperate for a job that i'm willing to switch teams.
I fucking give up. OKC is where small penises go to disappoint me.
I'm gonna play eenie meenie at the bar tonight because it's women's day and I deserve the dick
yeah the highlight of my day was the 911 operator telling me they had frantically been trying to figure out where i was
It was hands down the most magical fuck I've ever had
It was the only fuck you've ever had..
I bet you my entire life savings of $0 that there's a Doctor Who porn parody and that it features the sonic screwdriver being inserted into some cavities
I just wanna go home jackoff, eat chicken fingers, drink beer, play halo and go to bed. I'm sick of this shitty school, the shitty kids and having to fucking teach them.
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