Considering the face that your still in jail Im gunna go with no.
just got my goo swallowed for the first time. colors seem so much more vivid now, and more rainbows are outside
Tonight was like the Noah's Ark of alcohol. I had to have two of everything.
So Ive been fucking her for the past couple months and i just found our that my grandfather and her grandmother were fuck buddies for a while. I feel like this is a new awesome family tradition that skips a generation.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I FOUND AN AUSTRALIAN THEY CALL VOMMING 'RAINBOW SNEEZING' I'M NEVER LETTING HIM LEAVE EVER
Well, we broke up and instead of putting my shit out on the curb like a normal person, she fucking donated everything to Goodwill. So now I have to pay two dollars for one of my own t shirts.
I'm sorry, you're actually right. Ostrich racing happens, and they're ridden like a horse. Bewildered and distraught.
I just rode a horse than walked onto my property in boarshorts, flip flops, and holding a 40. What do I win?
there's cocaine on the ipad again........... was your sister here last night?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You let someone poor beer into my mouth off of a balcony. Best friend test failed.
Haahahahahahhaaa
I've spent my afternoon dipping strawberries in DayQuil if that's any indication of where I'm at in life.
Turns out he's just a recently divorced IT guy. Not a wizard.
do nipples grow back?
How was I supposed to know the accent was fake before i slept with him
I could be doing way worse things besides texting him 'come over and bang my headache away'. i could be on meth
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