So me and friend just finished Eiffel towering this girl and sounds great in theory but after the high five has commenced its just a weird threesome especially when you make eye contact with your buddy during the session
Are you really this nice or are you just trying to get in my pants?
Both?
We decided to leave the bar after we shattered a glassand then drive to steal a baby pool for our water festivities tomorrow
I vaguely remember walking down the highstreet with a plate of K offering lines to passers buy. I sold a line to a taxi driver.
Dude I live in a fucking closet and still get laid every weekend. Figure it out.
Somehow me not being able to breathe due to cocaine doesn't seem very domesticated.
We're using joints as your birthday candles
And is it bad that I haven't talked to guys who I haven't already dated? I feel like a recycle bin.
Just found out that guy A from the threesome I had is now dating guy B's younger sister
Should I be scared that after we hooked up she took antibiotics with Sailor Jerry's?!
We smoked weed. AS A FAMILY. IT WAS BEAUTIFUL.
The only alcohol at my aunts was mikes hard so I drank 9 of them and puked in the master bath
I'm drunk still and I cried and now I'm watching Whitney Houston singing the national anthem and I'm crying more
He just jumped up off the couch, screamed "ITS OVER NINE THOUSAND!" And then attempted to fly out the window like a bird. I don't know nor do I care to know what just happened
i think you might have coined the term "slightly awkward pyromania"
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