Currently listening to 'Just Put it in Your Mouth.' remember when i went through that phase?
she is the female version of PC from the mac and pc commercials..i'll still hit tho
just used a blowie as payment for him having to take the dog out to let her poop.
ok please explain why some one shaved half of my pubes?
He's warming up to shark week, by only eating fish and drinking vodka, and all the time he keeps yelling "death to the seals!"
No, he attached a coozie to his crutches so he can carry his beer around the party.
How do you not remember seeing the kid from our chem lab table and repeatedly yelling "lab partners for life!" at him?
She came to the party with six kegs and a life sized portrait of Lavar Burton. SHE WILL BE MY WIFE.
It was darkish out, I was shit faced, and they should have marked the electric fence a little more clearly. The entire wedding reception saw me run full force into it
Nothing like hearing "I found your pinky nail" before you even noticed it was missing.
Every little girl dreams of the day when she picks up her fuck buddy because he's drunk at the gay bar again.
We were on a plane, I couldn't just grab his dick
When i was tripping hard i was banging Jeff's roommate and her room turned into Hogwarts
Also when we were banging i thought my high school librarian was perched up on top of the stereo like a gargoyle but it ended up just being her cat
He fucked me on the hood of my car outside his work, and now I'm paranoid that the doggie day care next door might have security cameras.
Justin has passed out on the toilet in a locked stall. Stay tuned for pics.
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