Standing here next to my mom talking to my friend trying to act like he doesn't sell me E every weekend.
her teeth should be alot whiter from all of those blowjobs she gives
You threw a hot dog at his face...I wouldn't call you either.
Apparently she ran into the Emergency Room declaring "ROOM, PLEASE" as if she were checking herself into Holiday Inn.
ive been a drunken mess for the last 5 days. i feel like a 19 year old again
Hooked up with 8 guys, puked 4 times, got a few bruises, and my face is still numb... I think this visit has truly impacted my college decision
the intervention consisted of my aunt taking me to chuck-e-cheezs and telling me that this was my future - either as a mom or as a waitress - unless i stopped fucking around.
did she buy you pizza?
I liked a picture of him with his pants around his ankles, if that doesn't say I'm into you, I don't know what does.
I need to puke. I need a shower. I need rehab. I need to detox and puke. I feel like demons are inside of me.
We are going to get high as balls and watch netflix
THIS IS WHAT BEING AN ADULT LOOKS LIKE
Dude, she got "I party too much" skinny. She looks like a recovering drug addict.
Sad fact: I'm doing that thing where I'm bored so I give myself Princess Leia hair and drink alcohol.
If you recall, I made a Zoolander reference almost immediately after you pulled out of me the first time we had sex.
Of course I fucked him. He was wearing a rainbow cock sock and cowboy boots.
You have ten minutes starting with this message to get here. Or I'm putting my clothes back on.
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