he pissed his pants, and she still wants to hook me up with him. I try not to date guys with bladder control problems... Unless they're loaded anyway.
Fuck that. Livers are so overdramatic and attention hungry.
i felt like the dude nobody likes from the mikes hard lemonade commercial
so some random man just messaged me on facebook "tig ol bitties" should i be concerned?
I totally cried the whole time and then screamed out my new therapists name....
This teachers last name is pfister and she did the fisting motion to help explain how to pronounce her name. This class might be good
this is terrible I feel like i'm trapped in a cage with a wild republican
Girl, he can't tell you not to take a bump just because you work tomorrow. You're on a wedding diet, remember?
They said you bought the guy a shot and was talking about being Greek and then all of the sudden just puked all in their pitcher of beer and got kicked out of the bar.
Fucking that physical therapist guy was the best decision I ever made.
Funny how I'm trusting a magic 8 ball I found in the kids toy section to tell me about my sex life
Did I send you a naked snap the other day with a fat blunt in my mouth with the caption "$1200 bitches!" ?
What is your friends name that I hooked up with? ....I think j found his credit card under my bed
leads to pukin, then cryin, then 24hr masturbatin binge, then cryin again and finally a combination of all 3
Smargarita sloshedurday tomorrow around 2
Bring a helmet for your liver
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