you were crying and the really sympathetic homeless man offered you a sip of his whiskey. who was i to stop you?
too bad they don't have a 'people you may be able to do' thing on facebook. it would save me a lot of fucking time.
It's an acquired taste. Like keystone. Or caviar.
Sunburnt clitoris. How do I deal with it.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I have been sober for so long that I miss hangovers... what is happening to this summer?
She called us while she was having sex to ask if we remembered to feed the cat
I dont understand how her boyfriend puts up with her weirdness
I really need to create fewer "the time I was on drugs" stories for my future memoir, "my first year in San Francisco".
good luck with that
IT'S LINGERIE PURCHASED FROM A FLEA MARKET, THE ONLY THING IT'S GOING TO BE POSITIVE FOR IS A TEST FOR HIV
I think the moment I knew you were going to black out was when I told you how many shots you had already and you were shocked and then poured another one
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Def over. He sent me a nude selfie but cropped it right above his junk. Total Silence of the Fucking lambs looking.
i chased my gummy vitamins with cold bacon, never say I don't take care of myself
Cleaned the whole house at 7:30 and after cleaning the bathroom I think I had cocaine on my sweatpants
He snorted adderall on my table. I have a feeling he's not trying to buy me flowers
Thx for last night. I've never had so much fun while being told my life decisions are questionable at best.
If you find me in the bathroom in a fetal position, licking frozen bacon .. I might have Drank a little too much.
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