What was that guy's name that you dated that wore the leotard?
If he comes back to you and I'm left alone in lonelytown I'm totally going to poo on your car.
i think i gave myself a perma-hangover. or god just hates me.
You know you're deprived when the only thing you taste while chewing gum is the 2 grams of sugar alcohol.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Sandwiches are there for you when porn isn't.
Great. I get laid, Leslie Nielsen dies. I can't have have sex anymore, the film community can't take another loss like this.
I don't think the best pickup line was. Hey I have never made a girl orgasm before but I'm sure it will work on someone like you.
If his smile makes you freak out and drop things imagine what his penis could do
You were crying in a drunken stupor for an hour because "the new daft punk album didn't blow your tits off"
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
How exactly does one go about seducing an older, possibly blind gentleman?
Urgent. Do not ignore. What does this "=$" shit mean. Quality foreign dick is at stake here
Settled one third of the tab. Am going back for sex. Love you, make friends
I encourage you to ignore feeling. Drinking more helps
Just ignore the penis. It's won't bother you. I promise.
I cannot pick him out of a line up. I remember he is blonde and his half flaccid dick looks like gonzo. So unless he pulls down his pants I don't know who he is
Randomize