Ryan Ross and Jon Walker left panic at the disco today.
I predict a mass suicide of the 14 year old girl population...
She wants her shit back. Clearly she missed the cheaters-get-their-shit-ritually-burned clause.
if i hear one more christmas song, i will fucking shoot myself.
she starting giving me head in the taxi..the driver told her to stop..she looked up, said "I'm the birthday girl", and kept on doing what she was doing.
For some reason I have a hard time believing getting drunk and recreating a movie about singing transvestites is ever very far from a situation you're in.
i woke up with my wallet keys and phone missing and a treasure map to find them stapled to my shirt.
haha i know
Subtly mention that I'm not a lesbian. I would only go for rebecca's nipples because they're pierced and I like shiny things.
I went around and congratulated every guy that had a beard for having one
Goddamn tequila
Well, I'm off to go seduce a gay man. In 10 years when I'm 300 pounds, sitting in a mumu surrounded by my 500 cats, remind me of this text. That way I can be like "ohhh THERE'S where I went wrong!!"
The sense of comroderie I've built with my liver over the course of this semester is beautiful
do you think our homemade porn will pass for my cinematography final?
I know I've never told you this before.. but Gyro sauce makes everything okay.
You can't honestly expect me to maintain an erection when you have the Glen Beck show on
I now know he's been cheating for a while. I also know HER name, address, phone number, Facebook account, religion and zodiac sign. I feel like I'm earning my restraining order. Point is, never fuck over a librarian.
I know right, I would blow him just for the satisfaction he would taste like vodka
Randomize
