The guy asked if i had a problem w/set schedules
They threw me out of the bar because I was arguing business ethics with the owner of th bar
no, i'm currently making the trek across campus to get all my stuff from last night. My ID is in one guys bed, and my camera in another guy's bed.
Note to self: do not take so many shots that you sit on the floor under the bar where nobody can see you, and reach out and grab peoples crotch.
Are you asking me on a date where we get shithoused and do some fingerpainting?
I don't think my body can handle the alcohol I want to put in it anymore.
Vegas should really enforce the buddy system because if not everyone is going to end up swimming during the water show in front of the Bellagio.
If the cops knock on your door and ask if you saw anyone throw an orange out the window I was never there.
Remind me not to get naked underneath a tree I'm allergic to again.
Based off the amount of cat hair on my poncho....i stole a cat last night.
A guy is going to be inside me and I'm gunna start singing "I am stuck on your penis, cause your penis is stuck in meeee!"
We took her out for fresh air and next thing we knew, she was stumbling around the backyard picking dead leaves up off the ground and putting them in her shirt to "save them".
True strength comes from lack of pants
Success! We fucked roommates!
He just said "I can't wait to penetrate you tomorrow" I sat in silence for a second...he attempted to save it by saying "I can't wait to enter you".
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