he has officially spend more money on me than any other boy. and its all gone to plan b. awesome.
He keeps the condoms in his bible. I guess stairs or elevator, we're getting to hell one way or another.
there's a guy looking for his pants in my room, is he yours?
i just found out the cashier has a picture of my junk in her phone.
Golf group in front of us has 2 hooker caddies. One guy was getting a lap dance as he waited to tee off. Only in vegas.
Is it sad that i just saw my moms thumb on the table & i instinctively put mine down cuz i thought she was thumbmaster?
Mimosa dick, like his cousin Whiskey dick, is just as ineffective but a lot more fun to be around
Just FYI, by the transitive property my breasts have now touched the Stanley Cup.
Do you remember the bathroom attendant when he put out his hand for a tip and you gave him a high five?
I have a bad feeling I'm going to like this fuck buddy
So, I've discovered that I'm approximately 70% nicer to my mother when I've had an orgasm in the last 48 hours. It's science.
All right well I’m making her sugar cookies and sleeping with her husband tonight. Just another manic Monday
why is half of my head shaved?
He made me promise not to describe his penis in detail to you....oops.
I don't know, all I remember is waking up at 4 in the morning to him going down on me.
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