I showed him my bush... on skype.
Why do you proceed to call me "Queen La Queefah?"
Now would be a great time to stop wondering " Who let the dogs out" and go to sleep
you told his mom that the only thing he wants for christmas is his dick in your mouth
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
just drew up plans to mow my front lawn into the American flag for world cup. that high and patriotic.
Oh the joys of strong arming a man into exclusivity
I told him I don't date guys unless they play a musical instrument. So, he's here and he brought a kazoo.
Why do I always miss the parties you're naked at?!
I get naked cuz your not there
I respect your roll as DD and there're am required to respect your vehicle
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
She called it a palate cleanser. She and her friend dike it out once a year before returning to dick
Together or do they pick up? How far do they go? IS AN AUDIENCE PERMITTED? GODAMIT ANSWERS MAN!!!!!!
Ran into my statistics professor at the bar, he chugged a car bomb and yelled "x bar mothfucker!". On average I'm loving this PhD program.
I buy a new bowl every time I get a new guy. It's retail therapy.
UHG. i just want to have hot lesbian sex and eat pizza with you.
He described his sex dream about me using only emojis
Maybe it’s too soon to casually tell the boss that I went to Tulsa for some dick last night
Randomize