Have you ever slowed down next to the oldest people on the highway while getting road head just to see their extended reaction?
would it be rude to tell a homeless man that he should sell the lebron jersey and brand new nikes he's wearing if he's really that hungry
What did I eat last night that was bloody?
Hypothetical question: If a guy wanted to watch you fuck me, would you be willing to take a long lunch break on Wednesday?
Puking green right now......... jaimison mcflurry very bad idea
dude, i turned on the light and asked if they were ok and they STILL didn't stop. Most determined sex EVER.
She is banging on the liquor store door begging them to let her come in.
I was throwing up in the shower. He was throwing up on me. It was a cute couple moment for us.
I'm looking forward to the release of my future best seller - "Three Words to Make Your Relationship 100% Better: Surprise Blow Jobs"
I'm pretty sure I said "this might be the last time I'm in here" but then I took his pants off so that's a mixed message
You having your own car has severely reduced the amount of blowjobs I get.
Had to sacrifice my vibrator batteries to the thermostat gods. I had a dirty dream and also almost a heat stroke.
He has a baby picture of himself on the night stand. I don't think this whole 'one night stand' thing is for me.
I want you to know I am at work super hungover and I threw up in the mop sink. I feel like you will appreciate this
You're my fucking hero
you know your booty call is really trying when he offers to pay the toll for the bridge you have to cross to get to his house
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