Sry I called you an 8
Nope, Im Irish and pissed with some drunk mixed in...therefore punching things is the best solution to every problem.
i just saw a white kid with an afro using a martini shaker as a coffee thermos. go college.
organizing the empties. That sober.
I'm bleeding from my lower lip, and I have bruises around my neck. It was just easier to say I got mugged.
i don't care if its just a preseason game, my pick up a guy and suck him off in the bathroom skills are in midseason form
No it was the best sex I've had in months. Nothing turns me on more than getting rid of a boyfriend.
Jesus told me in my dream not to go to the party. I am athiest for tonight PARTY ON
You were great dude. You wanted to charge the guy with fedora $100 to get in.
just texted my dealer that i could taste the blue but not the cheese. i said i could taste blue.
We played a 4 hour game of True American then we fucked on the floor for a couple hours Happy 20th to me
my very deepest apologies for the unintentional cock block.
Life update: This fucking MacBook repair guy called me over last night for a booty call and he didn’t have a condom OR a bed
I'm reading the Hobbit in my blanket fort alone with a bottle of wine... all I need is dungeons and dragons to complete this superfecta of awesome
I wiped my ass with a McDonalds wrapper. I've hit an all time low. Sorry for my impatience
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