They wont let us in. Theyve some sort of no Daft Punk costume rule
and thats how i got kicked in the balls by micky mouse
after we had sex he went grocery shopping. at 6 am. i've never been more confused in my life
He skyped me to learn how to roll a joint and for us to masturbate together. And you said a long distance relationship wouldn't work.
He got drunk and insisted on licking my eyeball and called it a test of my trust in him.
she's using motion activated glade air fresheners as some sort of early warning system
Haha pretty bummed I didn't stay night yesterday after the bj fest you described
I don't remember much of half-time. I do remember climbing onto the roof of the fraternity and telling people I was going to stargaze in French.
Don't worry we will all be making bad decisions soon
That's the most comforting thing I've heard in months
I just spent 20 mins in the shower washing n rewashing my body to get rid of stripper. I even loofa'd my face.
You're gonna be proud in the future that you fucked the next bill gates
She said she hasn't cheated on me in 7 and a half days and she'd like praise for that.
He’s actually a personal trainer. He said he hasn’t taught yoga in a while but the stripper prefers to introduce him as a yoga teacher
I burned my tit while he banged me and it was still the best kitchen sex EVER!!!
he said he couldn't believe he just lost his virginity and passed out. what have i done
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