How bad was it?
You ran around telling everyone that you were going to click them to death on google earth
My RA tried to compliment my pong tables design after he confiscated it
my voice of reason is faarrr too drunk for me to listen.
I have no idea why I said that. I have no idea why anything happened last night, I broke my toaster making a egg. I'm going to quit drinking.
I was running around taking people's drinks at the bar and just dumping it into my Gatorade bottle screaming roofies.
Dedicating my hangover to whoever the hell I hooked up with in the bathroom last night.
just kidding, dedicating it to the gods of mexican food. omnomnom
You left for an hour, then walked up to us at the bar, pulled 80 dollars out of your bra and yelled " drinks are on him".
Thought I was doing makeup today for a photo shoot for a short film. WRONG. Try I'm on the set for a Fucking Sci-Fi PORN.
I don't care that you had sex on my bed. I care that you used my lollipop condom. I was saving that for a special occasion
It was a special occasion. Your best friend had crazy awesome sex on your bed. Thank you
Well, I got drunk and told my family about what I expected sexually after a good first date.
i accidentally gave my stepdad ketamine so id say it was a fun weekend.
Do you know anything about how the saran wrap ended up on my toilet seat?
Found out that I went to the same elementary school as the guy I'm hooking up with. Kosher or no
I gave him breakup sex, AGAIN
totally just bought a bottle of gin with nothing but change
don't ever let anyone tell you that youre not 100% class
Randomize
