In the future we'll all be gay
I mean I can't believe yesterday ended w/ your house getting firebombed. What an unexpected turn of events
You know you're true friends when you can talk about what sexual diseases you may or may not have.
he's dressed up as spiderman, i don't understand why he's crying.
Apparently I was trying to convince him Springsteen has had buttsex. I ended the argument with "I bet he came from it too."
My Grampa even called her out for being a cock block at the bar...it was that serious
Stayed out til 7 am.... Did u know there's a guy who goes up and down the quad at that hour playing bagpipes?
I want him in the "you're a terrible idea and are probably going to get me killed by my parents, my siblings, and my boyfriend" way
I thi k this dude I fcken showed up to the bar in a raisins shirts. I thought I was better than that. Fuckkkk.
I feel like I should be doing a victory lap around my house to the rocky music, or zapping and smiting people with my mystic wizard powers
I will accept it in the form of tooth necklace but if you have better ideas I am open to suggestions.
Also, no joke, I think that raccoon hair is still in my eye from last night.
They finally caught us and banned us forever, but it was worth it because we didn't have to pay for light bulbs for at least 3 years.
So you stole light bulbs, from your favorite bar, and got banned, and you're happy?
Look we couldnt pay for light bulbs and ramen, and you can't eat light bulbs or cook in the dark. Win - win.
Either of you know why the shower was on and the bathroom door wide open with no one in there at 6 in the morning?
i regret nothing
brb throwing up in the dishwasher
i regret everything
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