He yelled GOOOOAAAALLL when he came.
And hes hitting me with his balls, really hard.
i just licked my manager on accident and i'm freaking out
sometimes i think what itd be like to be a firework
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
you handed the cop a condom last night and said "it's all about protect and serve right?"
Just found out the guy that gave me herpes died. now everytime I get a flare up, it'll be like he's coming back to say hello
Just had to pull out another loan to pay for that public drunkenness citation. I am so ready to graduate.
I knew he cared when I got his text "happy birthday to the girl who gives phenomenal head"
I'll just be here. Naked. Eating tots and jello like a muh fuggin G
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Major win last night. I traded my roommate two cigs for a six pack and a bag of beef jerky. This has been a Brian weekend update
I decided to do drugs in front of her because if anyone can handle the truth it's a ghost
Who brings nunchucks to a funeral?
You know it's time to call it a night when every guy in the bar (all 3 of them) have seen you naked at one time or another.
final thoughts: i just want someone into choking me out, weed and anime
He said my vagina smelled like pomegranates. Its like my vagina is the fountain of youth.
Randomize