I tried to gradually lead her into my room but she wouldn't stop crying and quoting memoirs of a geisha
i wore my purity necklace wen we fucked. but its ok cuz simplified was blasting in the background
hahahaha. im glad listening to simplified justifies breaking ur promise to god
and i forgot to tell you that my armpit hair is now completely grown back. man i love winter.
Just got motor boated by a horse in the street
I deserve a fucking award for best roommate. I just cleaned his room, so he can have a 3 some
I'm gonna fuck that sweet little pussy of yours into absolute submission
Wow. Sorry. As soon as I sent that I felt inappropriate. But yes. Bring a sandwich after. Lol
Yeah, I've been trying to get him to eat healthier. Turns out he'll eat almost any fruit or vegetable as long I let him eat it off my body.
It was everywhere. My dick was a sprinkler of lost future children.
It wasn't a great time! You grabbed me, picked me up, and make me pee in the sink!
My boobs are numb because I've been using them as stress balls
Last night was incredible. I can tell by the nacho cheese on my jacket
You texted me the words "butt stuff" 53 times in a four hour period last night.
I'm surronded by jorts. You're probably too drunk to care. I'm gonna cry now. Love you.
Just deepthroated a hot dog. Thinking of you
In other news there's 12 shirtless Korean dudes all trying to jump on a tiny little trampoline so that's entertaining
Randomize
