the chair was smiling at me in sociology and i had to try not to burst out laughing.
I just creeped all your pictures on Facebook -- it was like I watched you grow up right before my eyes.
new call of duty comes out in november. guess im not passing my finals
It is virtually impossible to listen to single ladies and perform any seated task.
I just offered a homeless man a meal from McDonald's, and he replied "I don't eat McDonald's food". That is the epitome of "begger's can't be choosers."
I don't care. I'll be that guy that eats cake in a car. Alone. With the doors locked.
Either he was jacking off or having a seizure next to me in bed. Either way, I was too lazy to help.
I actually had fun getting arrested. That high.
Theres a high probability there will be two hot men waiting on you in your bed when you get home for lunch.
Happiness for him is a different happiness than you can supply cuz you have life standards, morals and goals that dont include the bar or beer everynight.
Also, you peed on your hand last night. Id just like to point that out
Just realized I used a picture of my little sister to holler at a guy, only 3 months old and she's already my wingman.
I got to her place and she was petting her cat and pounding vodka out of the bottle. She looked like Dr evil in yoga pants. She's nuttier than squirrell shit.
He plays guitar, sings like an angel, and acts like a gentleman. If I don't fuck him by the end of first semester, I'm dropping out
When the paramedic asked Logan how he fell he explained that he was trying to lick his eyeball, missed and tripped over his own tongue.
Randomize
