The weather is perfect in Seattle right now. Warm enough for girls to not wear bras, but cold enough for me to see them nipping out in the shade.
you won't ask to borrow his earbuds because you think it's gross, but you'll have sex with him?
I saw an Asian dude carrying a patchwork denim purse get into a car with two rednecks at the grocery store tonight. Imagine what I could have seen if I had actually done something interesting.
Her problem is just that he inner beauty is just as ugly as her physical beauty
My body isn't even mad at me...just disappointed
Even tho I saw his penis. He is still a really nice guy.
They nicknamed me the gargoyle. Sex with me is getting gargoyled. The last one I fucked yelled "gargoyle me" for dirty talk. I think fucking me is part of their pledging initiation. Somewhat OK with this.
Getting wasted on top of a casino. My penis is so much higher than everyone else's right now.
Sorry for trying to force you and Robert to make out. I didn't realize how awkward it was until I woke up today.
I will be naked everywhere
Once you mention butt plugs, conversations always take a turn for the worst.
We had sex on a lawn chair while fireworks were going off last night. It was unavoidable that I got mosquito bites all over my ass
yeah, you could tell they werent used to the strange things that i say. they were all outright shocked when i told one guy i hoped someone kidnapped him and stretched his dickhole over a fire hydrant
I apologize for there being a shopping cart in the living room. I don't know how why or where i got it.
He’s definitely circumcised. There’s not enough room in those speedos for a foreskin with that fire hose he’s packing.
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