Police were just in my backyard to recover a loaded .38. What the fuck?????
you assured me you'd make it home safe because your pizza rolls were waiting up for you.
Blood drive hookups: you will probably faint during the sex, but at least you know neither of you has AIDS
What do you think it is?
It's a boy. I know it. She always manages to have a cock inside her somehow.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
quick, send me a pic of a fat chick eating ice cream in a bikini. no joke, no questions, just do it.
Freshman ate returning to campus. Let Operation Slut Storm commence.
Did you just say he wants to put a baby inside me?
I danced with this guy last night, I left like I was humped by a blind baby kangaroo trying to body-box.
My girl came home. i was jacking off on the couch and she just starts telling me about her day, as if im not half naked with my hand on my cock.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I know I come to this conclusion on a fairly regular basis but I really do need a babysitter
Would it be weird if I bought knee pads and shin guards to fuck in my car?
Oh my fucking god that cat looks just like you after you accidentally took Ketamine
FOUND MY PANTIES COMINY JOME
I'm rolling and just noticed that the thread count on these sheets is horrendous.
If you feel frisky later I have a cowboy hat that would look great on you naked...
Who is this......
Randomize