How many nights a week you wake up with sticky boxers cause you were dreaming of Clay Aiken? Your wife mad?
just saw ex-bf. should he be more embarrassed to be a college dropout working at rite aid or should i be because i was buying newports and rembrant?
tie
you kept lying down on the floor at the bar just to prove you could get back up
it's sad when i round the corner and the dog goes directly for the liquor store
the campus cop used the word depravity in our citation.
I didn't ride the struggle bus so much as drive it backwards off a cliff.
A houseboat for a bachelor party is a terrible idea, we nearly die when on dry land, so how the hell are we supposed to survive a 3 day binge on a massive lake?
I don't remember anything that happened last night past 10.. I made him buy me a Buckeye's Donut tshirt. I have no idea why he'd want to fuck me after that.
The last time I've felt a woman's touch, the twin towers were compromised. You can wait like one week
I had a dream that my roommate walked in on me masturbating and I hissed "I'm not stopping this orgasm train for the likes of you" and just kept going
Seriously? People are paying $45 for Surge?!? I've seen better one night stand decisions being made then the choices being made on amazon orders of Surge
I'm the only person I know who could have actual sex and then dream about my vibrator.
Secrets from the porn industry: liTERALLY SHOVE A SEA SPONGE UP YOUR VAGINA GO ON DO IT
Hey bring in backup. its going to take a lot more beer than we think to fill up the water bed...
YOU UNCULTURED BADGER
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