Yeah i mean there's 3 guys fighting over me. It would just be bitchy of me not to get with at least 1.
this girl walked outta his room as i was walkin in to scottys and i just say " time for the walk of shame baby! whoooo!". she ran away
It has to be really easy to get midgets drunk.
bubblegum was invented today. we're getting drunk. end of story.
i'll prob lay in bed. its weird not having to track my wallet down, its become such a weekly habit. i suddenly have so much free time
Pretty much gone. He was in the backseat and kept whispering that his "toes felt like pigtails"
you can't tell me you didn't shit your pants I saw them in the trash can by the bathroom.
what customs doesn't know wont hurt them
It was like die hard. Except with more penises.
Oh if we have sex in public no one will frown upon it. They will stand and cheer for it
I'll feed you vitamin c from my mouth this weekend. Like a baby bird.
Promise??
Those drunk pictures you took of me? My mom is showing those to my grandparents.
You casually put your finger in my ass and other people are weird..
That was my first party and they were so suprised that this little freshman girl was a FUCKING BEER PONG QUEEN.
well tomorrow I get to eat fungus and go to an abandoned city.
most people would fear that statement, but i wish to join you
Randomize