never play flip cup with pint glasses
so I found out that he is the older brother of a friend of mine from high school
awkward
no it got awkward about 40mins later when he invited me to stay the night...with him and his girlfriend.
dude I just realized something - girls return my clothes washed so in thought bringing girls home is like avoiding going to the laundramat
Is it bad that when my prof gave examples of "stalking" behavior, I either have done or would do most of them?
He said "I know I'm not gay. I fucked a guy once and didn't like it"
i'd be lying to you if i said i didn't just bring up microsoft excel to make an alcohol budget
I'm thinking I had intended to send you pics cuz I woke up naked
To celebrate your birthday last night, I got drunk and sang drift away in buffalo wild wings. Happy birthday. The entire bar sang the chorus with me. It was magical.
I think I should advise against you hooking up with a guy that throws "the shocker" up in all of his pictures on facebook. Just sayin.
I found some video of you on my camera that's like 5 seconds long, where you announce that you should have been a dentist before taking a bong hit.
He came to my Harry Potter marathon wearing a Hogwarts uniform. Of course I fucked him.
Did you know they have a bouncer at Applebee's because I did not
Between having seen you naked and interpreting your values based on the occasional political FB post, you're no stranger for sure.
I'm definitely single now but she stole my mailbox
Giant stained glass jesus is judging my black pleather pants
Randomize
