he thinks he's going to hurt your feelings
He can't hurt my feelings
I don't have feelings.
don't get me wrong, i like my boss a lot, but not enough to not bang his daughter
He just said "Chunky" very loudly in his sleep.
Just farted cum and thought I shit myself. Crisis averted tho
I asked about his 3 inch scar on his chest. It's from when he had to castrate a bull on the estancia. Apparently this is how good bull meat is made.
Just wrote the directions to get to the girls house im hooking up with on the back of my marriage certificate. Officially worst husband ever.
we flagged you as soon as you tried to put the lime in the microwave to prove it was really a kiwi. again.
She tried catching cigarette ashes on her tongue like snowflakes.
There was a point where you were singing "Friends in Low Places" to yourself while Juicy J was playing so I got worried.
Let us ponder on the good times. Ya know when the Jonas brothers were incapable of growing facial hair and I didn't fully understand what a dick looks like
Her mom came in and passed out drunk on the floor next to us while she was riding me, "it's all good, she does this all the time" is what she said
do you think that identical twins have the same size junk? i just want to know your opinion before i find out.
The wedding is over. Operation sleep with my step-sister has officially begun
i literally have the attention span of a weasel on steroids, but yeah, i know who you’re talking about.
I sort of feel bad for this orthodontist. The things that have been in my mouth in the past 12 hours aren't exactly socially acceptable.
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