I tried watching the view, i got through 8 minutes. That is probably a world record.
They always sound like a bunch of chickens.
I think I just need to sleep with both of them to see which I want to date.
You just went from promiscuous to slut in 3.2 seconds.
he's been in the country 4 hours and we just did it in the closet. he called me "miss flirtatious in the cupboard." i'm in love.
I got to the point where it seemed like she had 8 giant breasts instead of just two
I am too drunk to make real decisions. I had pop rocks all over my ass earlier. This is not a joke.
My tits are coming out a minimum of ten times
your drunk ass trust falled a guy double fisting bud limes and as a result your head bounced off the patio table. So that might explain the stitches on the back of your head.
Absolutely. I could drink and smoke that memory away in a matter of years at my current rate.
I'm semi drunk. I just bought you penis moisturizer. Not kidding. Keep an eye out for the package. Merry Christmas.
I think you should do the fixer upper relationship. Like lawyers do pro bono work with underserved populations, you can do pro bono relationship work.
He doesn't like Sabbath and that alone is a GIANT red flag. Learn from my experiences and never, I mean NEVER associate with people that hate Black Sabbath and Motörhead.
How can you tell that you're blacked out ?
You can feel it in your nipples.
Why are you drunk at the library?
Why not?
What happened last night? All I know is that I walked into class this morning and everyone was chanting my name.
People probably think I’m a fangirl bc I go to so many shows but it’s really bc I like fucking the tour manager
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