I woke up this morning in your mom's car... any ideas?
They're all gay and their wifi network is named HOMOS. I want to live with these people.
no memory loss, but i'm unhappy with my memories
CAUTION: TWINS DO NOT HAVE TWIN PENISES.
You really need to tell him that he has a girlfriend. I'm not sure he knows
The Swedes wanted a tensome.
She is banging on the liquor store door begging them to let her come in.
Just had to buy plan b w/ my robotic baby from family living.. Awkward.
So neither of us had a dollar bill and we couldnt find a straw so we spent all nite doing coke through penne pasta
Can we just smoke a few bowls and eat grilled cheese while drunk in our hotdog suits at 9am ?
I just want to emotionally destroy him but also find out how big his dick is so this is perfect
I'm driving home wearing one sock, boxers, and a tee shirt. That's how good it was
I lost the right to judge tonight
At least you didn't lose your virginity to chumbawumba
He knocked me over backwards in my chair. I had a beer in each hand. Didn't spill a drop.
Randomize
