I don't think you know how difficult it is to pee in poncho..
i just dont know how to see an unattractive person as more than a friend
my grandma was just praying before dinner, and before she could finish my gpa lifted his glass and said 'and here's to avatar!'
he turned the pretty ricky playlist on. its about to go down.
No i peed with you in the toilet. The guy I high fived was mid pee in front of the urinal
Swear to god, if I have to wingman for you on my honeymoon I'm gonna be pissed
Sharing a bathroom with a guy sucks. I always have to set an alarm for the middle of the night just so I can take a dump. Poop text btw
Everyone else in class agrees the weed smell is coming from me
This is a whole new generation of premature ejaculators
I think my dove chocolate wrapper just told me to masturbate.
I'm pretty sure I broke my breathalyzer by breathing vaporized vodka into it.
My boss and I ended up at the same strip club. We both got lap dances while talking about work.
there is definitely a hickey on my left nipple.
I saw that he had a tattoo of a map of New Jersey on his arm, so i slowed down to like 20mph and pushed him out of the car
He gave his liver a pep talk before the vodka chugging started
Randomize
