babies were throwing up all over the place
question - sack: should she or should she not play with it during foreplay?
Do you want the good news or bad news first?
bad news
The bad news is i thew up on your bed, the good news is i found out who ate your cheetos.
i'm writing my speech about my 4th grade backstreet boy concert experience. that sums up how seriously i take my life.
ok this guy next to me just sat down with a no joke, 10,000 page book, popped an addy, cracked open a red bull and opened the book to page 1.
i figure i've seen his cum stains on the floor, i'm allowed to say these things.
I was the one passing out cake at the bars
I found a horn on the street but it's okay I disinfected it with vodka
I'm getting flash backs of last night. They're coming in song form.
um so slept at robs. he woke up, looked at me, and said ' oh my psychiatrists are gonna have a field day with this one' I think that's when you know you can't hang out with someone anymore
She was moaning so loud as i walked out of the room her roommates gave me a standing ovation... i think they are next
Stop giving guys blow jobs because you're no good and it's messing up my sex life. Word gets around & then they think it's me and don't believe me when I say I have a twin. Learn to stuck dick right.
How's my date look?
Like a retarded elf
In a good way
I just plagiarized Dr. Curtis Connor's ideology from Spider-man in an essay on genetically engineered embryos. College: academic integrity at its finest.
AND ONCE AGAIN THE HENNESSEY MAKES ME A SUPER SAIYAN
Oh for fuck's sake, is that why the couch is in the pool???
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