2:45a: Any chance you got 3000 bucks on you?
there's a guy here who looks like a hipster got a hold of obama and gave him a makeover.
Is it sad that I'm on the stopduiaz.com website and there is a cute boy but it will never work between us because hes in jail for 17.5 years?
Um.. is it mean if I say yes?
How would my first penpal letter even go? "Hey saw you on stopduiaz.com, sucks you killed that motorcyclist. Whats your favorite thing to do on the weekend?"
She stuck a Big Gulp bend-y straw up his ass to see if he could handle anal.
Ew, and?!
Well he couldn't and the deal was he had to drink something using it afterwards.
I just smoked a bowl in the dining room and am now drinking a glass of chocolate milk. i can't believe i'm getting paid for this.
I just watched a woman break three wood planks with her boobs. I don't know how I feel about that
Matt is in the hospital again. the night nurse text me asking not to bring the boombox again. is it sad or awesome that they are starting to know us?
I still can't believe he turned down that threesome with us in central park. He must be really committed.
Just got a ride from a stranger while walking a mile home as it hailed with no coat. He asked me if I smoked, then said he just made some potent cookies and I could have one.
The cookie was what I originally wanted to tell you. Always say yes to drugs from strangers
stop fucking thinking about him when there is A MILLION OTHER PENISES TO RIDE IN THE WORLD
You bring me burritos. Of course I text you during sex
Like not to be gross, he was eating me out while I was smoking a bowl. It was like a rap video
Omg. I can't go on a date with this man. His kids are too ugly.
Don't tell me I can do whatever makes me happy while also saying I have to put on pants.
The hump and dump is a beautiful thing
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