it was nice. we just kind of hung out. she didnt even mention the farting incident.
My place. Tomorrow Night. Bring your liver, and something for it to do.
would you object to me following you around all the time with a video camera and selling it to TV? Your life could make me millions.
I shall celebrate this moment with a beer conveniently located in the sock drawer directly to the right of me.
the bouncer made me realize that puking in line does not get you in any faster
The drunken tricycle race really added some class to the Tour de Franzia. Until everyone wiped out and started puking.
When you started Hi-fiving people I knew u were fucking gone. You slapped some dude on the shoulder when he wouldn't hi-five you and he asked if he even knew you
At front desk. Got a beer drinking pigeon.
My saliva right now is around 7.6% alcohol/volume.
You talked the cab driver into taking a shot from your flask at a red light because "Ray Charles would want him to"
The highlight of my night was when you proclaimed that the man standing next to you smelt like grape medicine...
You know what would make the espn body photos even better? If anyone knew who any of those fucking athletes were. That, and maybe not feature Gary Player.
Any chance I can buy my dignity back with $45?
I asked my mom if she could pick up something for me to drink since we ran out of orange juice and she goes "We have beer, champagne, and baileys. Drink one of those."
I ripped off the screen and literally supermaned through my bedroom window. That wasted
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