Oh KT! There was no tea in those Long Islands...
He bought me ice cream and then I gave him a bj
I think that's fair trade off
when i was 16 reading the aftercare instructions at the piercing place i wondered why they would ever think to warn me about getting semen in my bellybutton
then i met college
he told me I talked like a deaf person
i had a dream that i had so much marijuana that i didn't know what to do with it. i woke up and cried.
tuesday night obama will do an address about the oil spill at 8... it'll only be about 15 minutes... but i think thats plenty of time for a drinking game. key words "oil" "bp" and "responsibility"?
Fuck yes. Let's make bingo cards.
Puking green right now......... jaimison mcflurry very bad idea
just peed on the 7/11 floor and casually left. Omg so drunk
Long story short, the rash from your last birthday party told me not to go to this one.
#1 RULE OF DRINKING: DELETE YOUR EX'S NUMBER FROM YOUR PHONE
and it seems i've caught your masturbating bug. thanks.
i have officially banned the recreational use of bayonets.
Building a door into the garage so when I bring girls home my mom doesn't wake up.
Pathetic yet considerate
YOU WORK IN THE US CAPITOL! YOU CANNOT HAVE SEX IN THE BATHROOM!!
Dude, you are totally ruining intern season for me...
he has pokemon bedsheets but his dick is huge so i took one for the team
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