How old was that tiny chick? she needs a lard iv.
She has an album entitled "my photography", which consists of about 80 different pictures of a tractor that she took on her cell phone. I'm all for freedom of expression, but come on.
Nothing ruins a good sext like too many emoticons
I dont care how high you are, meat and sprinkles dont mix dude
Drunk
Deyhxbr
Fucaerrrrr
And the horses in Central Park have blankets. And Rafiki just told me "it is time" in the back of our cab.
I literally put my pussy on his sideburns, it was awkward
There's a lil minaj in everyone
So neither of us had a dollar bill and we couldnt find a straw so we spent all nite doing coke through penne pasta
I'm taking a leave of absence and sending myself to fat camp. I'll let you know when I'm out.
He's getting me an energy drink and said good morning beautiful. He must sense i'm cutting him off from the sex.
going on fb and having 11 notifications all from you is absolutely horrifying
I just got woken up by that guy wearing a Krispy Kreme hat giving out donuts
I despise everything about her. Except her tits.
He had a small dick and screamed "I will kill you if you don't get hard" to it in German...awkward time to have to explain I speak German too...
This is why you need to stop sleeping with freshmen.
Dick pics just aren’t doing it for me, this bowl of Mac n cheese and Game of Thrones trump you tenfold
Randomize
