no.. I went home. Puking up hot dogs and lemon tart isn't as lovely as it sounds.
im in Michaels with rachel and i see a little boy jumping around and waving a rainbow pompom. Welcome to our team little one
she was puking into the toilet drowning herself saying "its okay im a swimmer"
She's like the pied piper of lesbians.
Just tell him to eat fruit before so it tastes good. Then it's just like shotgunning a smoothie
Its 11am, im in the city in a pocahontas outfit, lost a heel and found a gold rolex in my lingerie.
He puked, did more shots, and then pissed in a drawer. We thought it was bad enough and all of a sudden...boom-clothes come off and he passes out with slippers and a styrofoam hat on and a guitar hero guitar in hand pretending he was slash.
If i ever have a kid with an outie i'm giving it up for adoption
She's an honest to god fucking ballerina. She did things I don't have names for.
I got carried to one bar. Got a piggy back ride to the next bar. I was just testing our drinking team for st pattys day to make sure they are able to handle me more drunk than that.
The guy I blew last night was pierced in multiple places. I had to use extra caution to avoid my temporary filling.
Now when you said you'd never sleep with me, did you really mean never on a Monday or never without handcuffs or a blindfold or never on a airplane or never without lots of booze? Cus never is a pretty strong word.
Im gnna go loik fir my newq gay friuend now
Goodbee
My adderall dealer raised his prices due to "impending inflation" ... never buying from a college grad again
I love her so much I can forgive her for wearing crocs
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