hi brent please bring bad word music cd must most bad word please brent bring cd music bad word please brent bring cd music bad word
just to let you know, don't open your linen closet for a while until i come over with a cleaning kit and geek squad
You stuck the head of a rubber chicken you found in her house up your ass and then started running around her living room. Naked.
I have been standing totally still for the past 6 minutes because I was convinced my foot was tied to the ground. It turns out it was a string of hair strewn across my foot
I don't know what you're doing, but there's a dragon on my street.
as you might have guessed from my lack of texts, the herpes have calmed down.
A woman on my train just walked down the carriage in a wedding dress, crying and clutching a can of Carlsberg. Oh...
Cut a hole in the crotch of my onesie so we could have sex without me getting cold. Best decision of my life.
he came in the room wearing gloves & rapping while eating a corndog
knight in shining armor
Naw, the sex dungeon had to come down so we could build a nursery. Cause and effect really.
Next time she asks for a ride to her "cousins" house and it turns out to be a booty call we're charging her for each mile.
I think the Predator is hunting me in my house. If I don't text you later, send Danny Glover. I love you all.
I'm just hitting the tip of the iceberg on accents for this trip...so basically my panties are done for.
I told him I was studying his body for art, so now I have to actually do a drawing of him to not look like a creep and so we can hook up again.
Dude, I need a fuckin wingman and this could finally make us eskimo brothers, how can you pass that up?
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