worst experience of my life. her nipples were sick. kinda like a venn diagram
When my kids ask how I lost my virginity Im going to have to tell them of a mythical thing called "Myspace" and how strangers could lure you into their "den of love" thanks to clever quotes and graphics
the Monday before Thanksgiving is not a Monday at all. Just Thursday in Monday suit.
sexting on a treadmill. speed 9.0 beat that slut!
if i found out she had a dick after i got head, does that still make me gay?
Speaking of morons, I just found half a Subway sandwich in the bathroom drawer You or your brother?
I seriously just found a rose petal in my vagina.
I'm pretty sure there was a language barrier but he knew what "harder" meant.
It sounds like heaven mixed with world peace and orgasms. The acoustics in this car are awesome. Or it's the weed idk either way it's great
Hey, this is Travis. I just so intelligently deduced that I am in a college dorm somewhere in western oregon. Probably WOU, based on the process of elimination.
there isn't one for "I'll give you an I'm sorry blowjob" but that's also an option you have. in the meantime here is an emoticon of a caterpillar
I'll give you $10 to get a dick pic with a gecko on it.
He was late, on account of he accidentally went to the Al-Anon meeting across the hall, and it took him 30 minutes to realize he was in the wrong room.
He sent me a 2am email the just said "Ping". Nerdiest booty call ever.
I'd say "I think I gave my TA chlamydia" is an accurate way to sum up my life.
Randomize
