Eww. Jon Gosselin got both his ears pierced.
He looks like a bad one night stand.
I ate a lot of your sunchips. I mean a lot. Like 4 to 5 bags.
I had to do a class evaluation today & the girl beside me didn't fill in any bubbles she just wrote in huge letters RETIRE across the whole sheet
Yelling drunk tank or bust at a cop, not a good idea
How many bratwuest were you able to fit in your mouth at one time? It's me, Hans.
I forgot how wholesome of a place a park is when youre not drinking there.
Michelle asked what I was wearing tonight. I responded with a g-string and plastic wrap. I've gotten no response since.
You said "sustain yourself" quietly over and over as you fed joeys hamster cashews. Acid you is a trip
How many strippers in the world do you think have had a debate with someone about the NRA?
Wait, just ask him if can you can join in. You haven't lived until you've taken part in a threesome with your father...or so I've heard
You know you threw a brownie at my head last night. And said you did it to defend the turtles honer....
Then he said,"I love you like a sister I like to have sex with."
I accidentally sent a snap of my puss with the Republican filter... Totally killed his boner
The wedding is over. Operation sleep with my step-sister has officially begun
Dont care about too tired for sex, thank you for leaving your laser pointer. I have now determined both my cats are stupid.
Randomize
