I wasn't excited about it either, but if I was going to have her take a load on her face, role playing as some french dude is the least I could do
Your vagain smells worse when im sober.
sorry, worng number
Could someone please kill snooki before she contributes to the gene pool.
Hey do you want me to wrap up that Jack in the Box you left in my gutter
I have Denny's hours of operations written on the palm of my hand....not in my writing, in a girls writing, is that as good as or equal to a cell number?
I am lonely and I want to touch your beard
I know it sucks but it's just something that needs to be done though. Like shaving ur pubes or going to the dentist.
You and the dog were competed for the water dish
In honor of Sarah Palin's bday I suggest we watch Nailing Palin
Oh Julie took your pants off last night, I put your pajama bottoms on, and Rachel took your bra off. It takes a village.
Guess who just sucked off 1/5 of one direction?
If I do nothing else today, the fact that I talked you into this is achievement in itself.
I'm chasing my vodka with snickers.
They're letting me in by good graces, I can't show up with a fist full of dildos
and please, if you feel the urge to call me crying tomorrow night, do so. i will be home bored and sober.
Randomize
