i just hate vaginas for liking penis's insside them
I just noticed that when I sneeze...my nipples get hard.
Tim said I dropped my taco in a puddle and still ate it.
I gotta bail on the cookout tonight. Im at the er getting stitches. Re-enacting porno went horribly wrong.
NO. NO LET HIS PENIS TOUCH YOU.
sorry for allegedly lighting the beer pong balls of fire
She had caution tape on her head and she blew me.
We won't have time to talk.. I'll be rolling you a blunt and you'll be getting naked.
I couldn't tell if they ere dancing or fucking but they won the costume contest
I. Did. In fact. Sprain. My liver. This. Weekend.
I SMOKED SO MUCH I SKIPPED A DAY.
Just had an oven catch fire while I was balls deep. Fire department came, I did not.
GOOD MORNING! This is your wake up call! Just incase this text wasn't enough, I had sex on your bed last night while you were drunk hitting on my sister. Dan jizzed on your pillow! We rubbed it on both sides! Now get up and go to class!
true. but still. you know how big of a sucker i am for a penis and a pretty face.
He ate me out in a golf cart while I watched the sunset. You are so right, golf skirts do provide amazing access.
Randomize
