he just tried to convince me that tylenol is a gateway drug
Screw this I'm going to go talk to her. If you hear sirens they're for me.
My three rules on what I'm wearing tonight. Something short, something see through, and something i had sex in.
She broke both of her ankles trying to jump off the balcony. it's like every time she drinks she makes even more impressively bad decisions than the last time
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Also, fighting a very strong urge to nickname your dick Whitey Bulger, at least for today.
I know, I know. But we've discussed my friends and appropriate social behaviour, and I'm pretty sure topless karaoke was a no-no.
I just started talking about my sextoy because I wanted things to be normal again.
They don't even know who I am but they just woke me up with maracas and invited my boobs to a kegger
I got dressed on his front steps, peed on his neighbors lawn, then did a shoeless walk of shame home at 5am...
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
that's the second time I've left that bar and slept with the person that's driven my car. thank god I don't take cabs..
It's Been a while since I puked in vomit bush. I hope it doesn't feel neglected
You know your night is done when the police confiscate your bra at high school basketball game
I already tell everyone in my office my bf is at the Naval academy. It slipped one time and I can't go back on it now
Still can’t get over the fact that we ate beef jerky off a strip club floor
just found a joint on the street in downtown. smoked it with the hot guy from my chem class
WHAT IS UP WITH YOU SMOKING/ DRINKING THINGS OFF THE GROUND?
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